Originally Published on Sunday, May 14th.
First, let me say, Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers who have graced and still grace our little blue green planet. What a remarkable job you all have done raising the next generation of successful little people. Motherhood is the hardest job. Wow to all of you! I am so impressed by my Mom’s and moms all over the world!
My recent journal entry on May 1st:
Spring, May 1st- after a cold and rainy weekend and my daily trips to Bridgeport where spring has already sprung I am longing for some warm, spring sun up here in NW Connecticut. Gearing rid of leaves and weeding a bit in the front flower beds was rejuvenating, but cold and damp. Planting some of our planters with pretty spring flowers made me smile, but I was so dang cold I had to go inside and make myself a cup of hot coffee just to warm up!
The grass is greening up, we’ve let the sheep out in the fields for those first few nibbles of grass, but even they were ready for an early bed by 5:30pm last night- cold and wet, we could see them staring at us by the fate begging with their eyeballs to let them into the barn.
Writing is interesting. Each time I go to write a blog, my weekly endeavor (planned with a specific goal this year), I start out with a theme I have been reading and researching, and a picture that captures the theme. It starts a little slow and then the connections come to me and I realize I am simply talking/writing and it flows.
Maybe that is how life is too. Maybe if we actually give ourselves the time and opportunity to be ourselves then we gain the feeling of happiness, calm- despite the hustle and bustle of the days. The days are long with everything we do, but what about those moments when we are “not doing”, just being. That is where our true selves can shine.
It was short entry, but when I went back to it, when I was thinking about what to write today, I was struck by the fact that I may be on to something here! My thoughts are filled with how to squeeze in more time for myself, how to make time for exercise and being healthy… perhaps instead of trying to squeeze more in (I am not sure I can squeeze anything else in unless I quit my day job, and I am can’t quit my day job!) If I allow myself to be more myself in ALL moments of the day- then myself can come shining through and it will be when I am my happiest. It goes along with last week’s post on practicing the art of saying no- I may need to say no to something’s in order for my real self to be observed and felt (not only by myself, but also be recognized by others). By stifling the self, I am only making myself miserable, delaying happiness and possibly also causing additional angst and stress.
A very wise friend recently commented about my writing and gave me some real fodder for thought. It turns out that my mind was coming to the same conclusions! It is the reason I shared this journal entry with you and the thought that I really just have to BE ME. Embrace the mess of ME and don’t care what anyone else thinks about it. Then, and only then will your true self be free to be itself and happiness and enjoyment of life will follow naturally. Embracing yourself and not caring what anyone else thinks takes a bit of practice, but I am used to practicing!
My High School year book quote:
“Nobody can be just like me. Even I have trouble doing it.” -Tallulah Bankhead
Remarkable, even when I was in high school, my brain meanderings bring me back to the same thought process! The brain is a brilliant organ, but sometimes it can really cause such trouble by constantly telling you you are not good enough, smart enough, etc. That voice inside us, the one that holds you back from being you- can stifle us from becoming our true selves and therefore cheat us of the happiness that we deserve in life. Teenagers are often caught between this inner critic and all of the teenage critics that roam the earth and share their opinions so openly. It is hard to escape all that negativity- but truly, if we learn to not care what others think, to be our most genuine and true selves, I am certain that happiness will follow.
So, now I have written this, and it will be so.
Ha! I also have to teach my preteen girl this. What a hard lesson. I hope it doesn’t take her as long as it took me.
Thank you Charlene. You are a true and wise friend, and I am glad to call you my friend.
Be well,
Teresa
