Dogs can sleep anywhere right? Even with their faces smashed up against the wall.
Wouldn’t it be great if it was that easy for humans?
As we approach the longest day of the year, the skies stay lighter later, the night ends earlier and earlier each morning, how do you spend this extra time? Enjoying the light outside, barbecues, late walks, sitting around a campfire with friends all ring true in my mind as I think about summer. We also have some extra hours for taking care of ourselves, including paying attention to our sleeping patterns. I wanted to share some tried and true sleeping habits that I have honed over the past few years, specifically once I started to pay attention to my sleep!
First, let’s say that I wasn’t a very good sleeper as a child. I had a hard time falling asleep at night. I remember having a pretty regular bedtime as a kid, I remember lying in my bed for hours, awake, not knowing how to help myself fall asleep. I hated nighttime for that reason. I used to get anxious about not falling asleep, so much so that I would get anxious about having to wake up- I would stare at the clock and do the math in my head to determine how many hours of sleep I would get. It was a vicious cycle of pressuring myself to try to fall asleep, my eyes popping open to see what time it was, then doing the math in my head to see how many hours of sleep I would get, then anxiety setting in about potentially not having a good day or feeling well because of lack of sleep. Then the cycle would continue. And continue.
My mom used to tell me that one bad night of sleep was not going to kill me. And she was right, I didn’t die after one of those terrible night sleeps. But I didn’t feel my best either.
Luckily, I passed through that phase, and was able to get some really good sleeps as a young adult. Then life changes again. Ella came along. I went sleepless again, worrying about her, worrying about how I would go to work if I was up all night with Ella (are you seeing a trend here?).
She passed through being an infant and toddler in what feels like two days, now looking back on it, though I know I had many sleepless nights, and nights where I slept in her room so that she could feel comfortable. I was not always thrilled about that, and it often left me anxious and worried about how my following day would turn out, but, I was her momma. That is what mommas do.
Finally, Ella was sleeping through the night and seemed to not have any trouble going to bed at the same time every night. Phases of her childhood brought some sleeping concerns, but always at the center was her momma, trying really hard to make sure that she felt safe, not anxious or worried, and calmed by deep breathing and meditation in order to fall asleep and stay asleep.
I had learned, you see, how to help myself when it came to my own sleeping patterns.
The Habits
Go to Sleep when you are tired and get up when you feel rested.
Follow the general rule of go to sleep when you are tired and get up when you feel rested in order to understand the true time your body wants to be resting. I am an early to bed early to rise type of person, however, I know that this is not for everyone. Do what feels best for you and then attempt # 2.
Go to bed at the same time each night and wake up at the same time every morning.
Ella and I go to bed at roughly the same time every night. We both say goodnight to Dad and Jake the Australian Shepard (he is usually sleeping already with his face smashed up against the wall near the stairwell, or crammed underneath our entryway bench capturing the cool A/C air) and wander up, take care of our bathroom business, set our alarms, chat for a few minutes and then say goodnight, she in her bed, me in mine. She rarely has trouble falling right to sleep, our days are quite full and we are usually both yawning when we are saying goodnight and I am closing her door. I hop right into bed, thrilled to be flat and fall right to sleep. Ensuring that you go to bed and awake at the same time every night clinches a good night sleep. Especially awakening time. I plan for 5tam every morning, and 4am on Saturday for baking. There have been times in my career that I have actually needed a few extra hours of work in the morning before actually going to work, so I have at times used 4am as my wake up time every morning. I have found that my sleep is more consistent when I go to bed and get up at the same time everyday.
Try to block some of the bad light.
When I take my contact lenses out for the day, I put on blue light blocker glasses for the evening so that I am blocking some of the harmful “keep you awake” lights from iPad screens, TV screens, etc. My blockers are not as good as Dave Asprey’s True Dark glasses, but I do need my glasses for an actual prescription, and my eyeballs really can’t take wearing my contacts into the evenings, especially with the spring allergens and the drifting smoke from the fires of Canada. By 6pm my eyes are tired and need a break. Dave discloses his affiliation with True Dark and promotes these glasses for continual use- you may have seen a picture of him with glasses that are tinted yellow or red- that’s True Dark. The idea behind it is that it protects your eyes and all of their parts from the confusing light from screens and devices. We can fool our eyes into thinking it is perpetual daylight, and your rods and cones will not send the messages to our brains that it is time to prepare for bed…thereby increasing the chances that you will not sleep well, and even if you do fall asleep it will not be restorative, because your body still thinks it is daytime.
Get heavy curtains for your windows.
That is why heavy curtains that block out all types of light, including natural light from the setting sun or the moon is so important. We really need our bodies and minds to know that it is time for sleep. I finally invested in a pair of heavy curtains for my bedroom- and it has been a game changer for me. I am no longer wakened in the middle of the night with a beam of moon light. My mind is prepared for bed way before I even go upstairs as well. We turn off lights, make sure it is properly dark while we relax before going to bed. We do watch a little TV, but I don’t find that it makes too much of a difference, however staring at your iPhone does- so I try to limit that as best I can.
Wake up to something nice in the morning, not a jarring alarm clock.
Ella and I both have Hatch alarm clocks. These are pretty cool devices that add soft light and sound as you fall asleep (cue the meditation) and an increasingly brighter light in the morning to wake you up. It works like a charm, and is so much nicer to wake up to light then to a jarring sound. In the evening, when we go to bed, we press the top button and our scheduled soft light and sounds begin, then the light turns off automatically and the sounds- mine of a forest- continue to lull you to sleep. In the morning, a gradual light that intensifies over 15 minutes turns on, slightly before you have set the Hatch to wake you up. I usually sense it within a few minuets, and am up prior to the sound part of the alarm. It is really lovely waking up to a sun rise rather than a loud beeping iPhone alarm. Mind you, my curtains are still closed, so I can’t tell that it is already light outside- of course it is- this time of year, it is already light!
That brings me to another point about sleep patterns.
Napping
There is also the blessing of a nap. Sleeping at night is better when you have at least one quick nap somewhere in your day. I cannot say I am good at this one, but on the weekends, when I can rest, not meditation- that is resting for your brain- I mean a real nap- your sleep is better- more deep sleep, and a better feeling when you wake up. My husband Jason is the kin of naps. I made fun of him for a long time, teasing that he was like a newborn, needing to nap throughout the day. Then i read a study somewhere that described the percent increase in life expectancy and longevity related to regular nappers (is that a word?), and I let up with the teasing. I encourage naps, I am not so good at falling asleep during the day, but for those of you who are, you are probably going to live a lot longer than me! Go for it, I say!
Track your sleep to see what works best for you.
I use an Oura ring, I have been collecting my sleep data for many years, and many of these habits above are related to what I have seen work to increase deep sleep, elongate the length of my sleep, etc. I would highly recommend a sleep tracking device for those of you who are analytical and want to see outcomes! For those of you who it may increase anxiety knowing these types of data points, don’t do it. Trust your body. Do what feels right and you will find better sleep.
Meditate.
We have blogged about this before. When I meditate twice a day, my life is better. In all regards. Including sleep. I have recently stopped meditating-simply by accident, running out of time, fell of the wagon, whatever. I will start again, and then I know, for sure, everything gets better in my life, including my sleep.
Don’t take my word or blog for it, read some of the books I have read below (there are others of course!) about sleep, see what works best for you. These are my tried and true habits that I have been cultivating for a long time. I wanted to share them with you as a way of maybe helping you thing differently about your own sleep habits.
Be Well,
Teresa
Additional Readings and Resources:
Sleep Smarter, Shawn Stevenson
Why We Sleep, Matthew Walker
Smarter Not Harder, Dave Asprey
Lights Out, TS Wiley
The Ripple Effect, Sleep better, Eat better, Move Better,Think Better, Greg Wells
Hatch: www.hatch.co
True Dark Glasses: www.true dark.com
Oura Ring: www.oura ring.com